It's really heating up in Big D with highs in the 80's and 90's already and the humidity is just awful to boot! Somehow, I am still managing to make it to the park most days, but truthfully I'm not sure how much longer I can hold up. I can't tell you how many times in a day I (we) have wished we lived near family. I've said it before and I'll say it again, it is really, really tough having children with no family around. I am so envious of my friends who have their parents and siblings nearby, and find myself wishing and wishing that we did too.

We're now less than a month away from the birth of our daughter and the reality of it all is sinking in. Physically I am very (VERY) ready to have this baby. Mentally I need another 6 months. I was just telling Sylvie this morning at school, I feel like the more pregnant I get (hence the more uncomfortable, more cranky, more tired) the worse Hudson behaves. Our once little "angel" of a child has turned into a big huge STINKER! Yes, I admit it, he's been bad lately. I guess the way it works is if you have a really good baby, the terrible two's are really something awful, and trust me folks, we're getting a good dose of it right now. I've been writing about this a lot lately, and I apologize if it's repetitive. I realize more and more as time goes on that parenting is difficult. Especially if you care a whole lot and you want to do it right, or I should say to the very best of your ability. In particular, staying home with your child is difficult and I question every day if I am doing a good job.

I am certain every parent feels this way sometimes. I've been reassured that what we're going through is all very normal and that it's only going to get worse (the really terrible three's!). For now I'm just taking it one day at a time. Trying to recognize those moments when things are really, really great, when there's lots of smiling and laughter and joy. Really, those moments outweigh the bad ones by in large. After all, if it was really as bad as I make it sound, would we be having another one?