personalities

Stoic stinker, Hudson Richard, 3 months and 1 day old.

Social butterfly, Madeline Elizabeth, 2 months, 16 days old.

Sleep

If I had to choose my biggest complaint about parenting there is no question it would be SLEEP. Without a doubt, definitely SLEEP. I can't decide why this is such an issue for me. I suspect it's partially because I love to sleep, so much so that if I had it my way, I'd sleep about 10 hours a night, every night and even more so (on some days), and then I'd take a really long nap on top of all of that... a nap which I would not by any means complain about. I'd have absolutely no trouble falling asleep, staying asleep or sleeping for a really, really long time.

Even if you aren't as big of a fan of sleep as I am (case in point: Scott, who requires 5 hours a day and functions just fine), okay, fine...but, you're body NEEDS sleep. So, why, someone please explain to me- in a way which makes perfect sense- why babies (and toddlers for that matter) don't sleep!! Why babies are born not knowing how to sleep, needing to be "taught" to sleep or "sleep trained". It's a simple principle, if you're tired- go to sleep. Well, someone had the brilliant plan to send babies out into the world not knowing how to sleep and not staying asleep once they actually do fall asleep. Genius. GREAT idea. If you hadn't picked up on it by now, almost 11 weeks of no sleep is starting to make me crabby...

It's our second time around, so I thought I'd be much more tolerant this time, much more laid back, able to handle it. I wasn't planning to read any books, I was just going to do what came natural, hence the "bed sharing" and the "feeding on demand" (aka: attachment parenting) approach which I've embraced with Madeline. Having read so many books with Hudson and feeling like a complete failure when he didn't do what the books said he would, I just decided I wasn't going to read a thing. Feeling like I already knew what to expect since I'd been through it before, I felt really good about this decision.

But what happens when what you're doing "naturally" isn't working for YOU? Ok, wonderful, it works just fine for Madeline, she's as happy as can be, she really is. See below.

So, there is something to this attachment parenting style after all. Honestly, I love it, too, but (yes, there is a BUT), it's a difficult style to stick to when you also have a 2 1/2 year old at home who you're trying to convince for the 247th time that pooping in the potty is NOT a scary thing. Yes, 247th is not an exaggeration, we've been potty training since September. Boys...

So, the attachment parenting style is wonderful, it really is. I love snuggling with my little girl at night and she sleeps great. The night before last she slept from 9:30PM- 5:30AM without waking. AWESOME! The best night yet. So, I feel really good about our night sleep, and then I came across this image on facebook a few days ago.

GREAT.
So, now each time I get into bed with my baby, this image pops into my head.
Super.

On top of that, I obviously can't nap all day with my baby, so we're working on crib sleeping during the day. It is not going well. At all. We nurse, rock, bounce, sing, and nurse and rock and bounce and sing again and again....and 45 minutes later we put her in the crib where she will only sleep on her tummy and she sleeps for a total of about 30 minutes. 40 if you're really lucky. Then at night, from around 5pm- 9pm, she won't sleep at all, not at all...during all of this, little phrases run through my head, phrases I remember from the books I read when I was pregnant with Hudson, phrases like:

"back is best", Madeline only sleeps on her tummy...

"back to sleep", again, a tummy sleeper, here...

"...anything less than an hour is not restful sleep and your baby will become overtired and it will be impossible, literally impossible to get them to sleep the rest of the day..." Great, so where is the paragraph that says what you're supposed to do when your baby doesn't sleep an hour and won't sleep an hour???


"do not, under any circumstances let your baby stay awake more than 2 hours at this age...." Again, where is the part that instructs you what to do when your baby refuses to sleep for 4 hours straight??


This totally and completely stresses me out, it really does. I swore I wasn't going to stress this time around, I was going to take it easy and just go with it. I wish I could, I really do, but one thing I've learned in my 38 years of life, I am who I am and I can not change it. I just don't do well with stressful situations and trying desperately to make your infant sleep, is stressful. It's very stressful for me.

And on top of all that, our toddler isn't sleeping well. I've written about his inability to nap many, many times on this blog, but now night time sleep is a big problem. He's afraid of the dark and he doesn't want to be alone. It's an hour or more every night of..."I need to use the potty, I want some milk, I want to sing more songs, I want some water, I want mom, I want dad, I want...um, um, um, um...." and while one of us is trying to reassure Hudson that he's safe and he has everything he needs and all he needs to do is please, please, please go to sleep, the other is out in the living room bouncing the heck out of our infant trying their darndest to get her to go to sleep. It's good times in the evening around here. You should see Scott and I when the sun goes down. It's rough. And when they finally, finally go to sleep, we're both so exhausted we just collapse, and it seems like just as you close your eyes on another day, it's morning time already, and Hudson is at the bottom of the stairs yelling, "daddy, daddy, come down, daddy, come down! I want some juice." And, so it begins, another day...

Despite Hudson's non-sleeping ways and our current potty training challenges, I do love that little boy more than I can put into words. I had no idea that once Madeline arrived I would miss our one-on-one time together so, so much...but, I do. I really, really do...I'm so glad we had our two and half years, though. They are very, very special to me.

So, to conclude my rant about lack of sleep, sleep challenges and sleep issues...I figure I can rest assured that in about 5 years or so we should have a handle on this sleep thing and maybe even be able to sleep soundly through the night again, in our own bed, all to ourselves. At least until the next crisis arises and our sleep is once again nonexistent....

"Here ya' go, Madawin!"

If you didn't know already, Hudson is a BIG fan of Cars (as in Lightning McQueen and Mater, Cars). He's got several Lightning McQueen cars which he plays with regularly. Today he thought he'd introduce "Madawin" to the famous Lightning McQueen. By the looks of it, I think she liked him.

supercondylar fracture- the video

This video was taken in the hospital the morning after we spent the night there. Hudson loves to hold Madeline, so his first opportunity to do so, he did. Well, kind-of. Here they are together. You'll also hear Hudson's explanation of what happened to him.

The Supercondylar Fracture

Yesterday Hudson had swim class, just like he does every Saturday morning. He was the only one in the class for the first portion, so he got some extra time in the pool. That's all well and good until his eyes start burning from the chlorine. When he returned home from swim class he was literally crying and just generally upset...it's also worth mentioning he woke up at 5:30AM and was pretty crabby, let's be honest...anyways, Scott and I were getting us all packed up and ready to head out for our "staycation" at the Gaylord Texan and since Hudson was so upset about his eyes, we told him to lay down in his bed and just relax for a little bit, which he did (surprisingly). 

We'd been talking up our "staycation" for a week or so and Hud was really excited about it, so he just decided to get out of bed and get going. With his eyes really bothering him, he tried to climb out of his bed and this is where the fun begins... I was in the kitchen when all of a sudden I heard screaming...I rushed into his room and found him laying on the floor crying. I picked him up and hugged him, and when I looked over, his elbow was bent the WRONG way. HOLY COW!!

I yelled up the stairs to Scott, "WE NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL NOW!!!!!!" He grabbed Madeline, we all got in the van and Scott drove record setting speeds to the hospital (thankfully, we made it there alive). 

Hudson was hysterical. He was screaming so loud when we walked into the ER that they called us back immediately and put us in an isolation room. Within 45 minutes Hudson had x-rays, an IV, some morphine and a diagnosis from the doctor that he had a "supercondylar fracture" which would require surgery to repair. Appartently this is a very common fracture in kids, but the surgeon said he usually sees it around age 6 or 7, not age 2. Well, he doesn't know Hudson. We must have explained what happened 100 times, but it wasn't until Hudson's morphine kicked in that we heard the TRUTH about what really happened. When the doctor asked him what happened he said, "I bounced. I bounced on my bed. I fall down..."

Well, that explains it.

He had surgery around 4:30PM yesterday afternoon, was out around 5:20PM and we were in a room by 7PM. The four of us spent the night together in his hospital room, and I must say, after that, I'm pretty sure we can handle just about anything. What a night! Hudson was a real trooper, he made us so proud. We were discharged around 10AM and he's been resting ever since. He's wearing a cast and is set to see the surgeon again in about 10 days, then he'll continue wearing the cast for 3 1/2 weeks. It's going to be a long month. No swimming. No rough playing. No baseball. No soccer. No playing outside. YOW. ZA. Anyone want to come visit???

Scott and the Hud in the ER (post morphine).

Me, Madeline (in the moby) and the Hud with the Lightning McQueen balloon I bought him in the gift shop.

Post Surgery, even Lovey got a cast!

The morning after, Madeline and Hudson, such troopers!

Soccer

On Friday mornings Hudson has soccer class. It's not really soccer as in teams on a field chasing a ball around and scoring goals...it's more of an indoor (hey, it's HOT here!) sport, more of a preparatory soccer class if you will, sort-of gearing these kids up for soccer in their near future. For Hudson that's not soon enough.

Madeline and I joined Hudson the first day of soccer class, but it proved to be a bit challenging for us, so now Camille (our sitter) takes him every Friday. She sent me this video this morning to show me how he's doing and it made my day, so I'm sharing it with all of you. Hudson is such a good kid and he makes me so proud every day.

Madeline's Smile

Madeline is changing so much, so fast every day.
For all of you who live too far away, here's what you're missing.